catchall nimona

[selfimmolation]

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[sharkgirl]

Ballister.

[she mumbles.]

My Boss. Or I guess ex-boss. I think I got fired. [...] He just figured out what he wanted to see.

[selfimmolation]

... Your sidekick gig? [ scritch scritch ] See, this is why Pops had to fight me for three months before I agreed to join him. You need time to know who you're working with.

[ it's a joke. he's trying. ]

[sharkgirl]

[she does laugh, a huffy little sound.]

He got set up by the Director. She made it look like he killed the Queen. So I... you know, everybody hated him too.

[selfimmolation]

... But he believed it when it came to you?

[ the set up. he sounds mad. ]

[sharkgirl]

Yeah.

Why wouldn't he?

[selfimmolation]

Because he knew you? Because he had the same thing happen to him?

[ just getting madder. absolute hypocrisy in this chilli's tonight ]

[sharkgirl]

[it kind of feels nice for ace to get mad, though.]

But he was misunderstood. [she says, bitterly.] He was a good guy being dragged into doing evil things because of a m-- a monster.

[she has a hard time saying that word, but she manages.]

[selfimmolation]

What, were you twisting his arm? [ he's only got one ace that's rude. ] He can't accept the people he followed could be this wrong, so he's taking it out on you? He's an idiot.

[sharkgirl]

[she's quiet, for a bit.]

They just see what they want to see. They need something to blame. So it's me. [it's her. it's mika, it's ace.]

[selfimmolation]

That's bullshit. [ and he sounds infinitely angrier here than he did about his own situation, but that's not that he never was angry there. ]

[sharkgirl]

[she pauses, and then noses at his jaw as a kitty, tail flicking back and forth.]

Thanks. [for being so mad on her behalf.]

[selfimmolation]

[ she's the kitty nudging but he's the one going mrr? ]

... For what?

[sharkgirl]

Being mad. It makes me feel less like I'm crazy.

[you know, for wanting to be treated like a person instead of a thing]

[selfimmolation]

... Of course you're not crazy.

[sharkgirl]

I know I'm not.

... They shouldn't have said anything like that to you, either.

[selfimmolation]

... Probably not. [ it's huffed out quietly ] ... I told you, right? What Whitebeard used to say? He said that to me, when I told him who my birth father was. Even though they were enemies back then, and I'd joined his crew without telling him... All he said was "Who cares who your father is? We are all children of the sea."

[ scritch scritch the kitty ]

... He'd have loved you.

[sharkgirl]

[children of the sea. she likes that, actually, she likes it a lot. there's an acceptance there that she wants. longs for it.

he pets, and she purrs quietly.]

I think I would've liked him, too. [she answers, voice a little raw.] He sounds like someone worth knowing.

[selfimmolation]

Yeah. He was. [ ... ] He was still alive, when I... but he was planning to stay behind so we could all go. He was sick, but he still waged war for me.

[ to. try to explain the past tense a bit. he doesn't know, if whitebeard dies for sure, but. ]

[sharkgirl]

[god.]

Yeah, of course he did. [that's not sarcastic or anything, it's just like - yeah, of course he'd do that for you. that's what you do for people you care about. you wage war for them, in both small and mighty ways.]

Ace, how did you... [she starts, and then. hesitates. she's not sure if she wants to know the answer to this question.]

[selfimmolation]

... You're better off not knowing the details. It wasn't pretty.

[ he told her he took a hit for luffy, and that is as much of that as he is willing to describe. ]

[sharkgirl]

[honestly he is saving her from nightmares here, so. that's fine.

a pause, and then:] Okay.

[she doesn't really know what else to say to that. she'll just imagine it instead.]

[selfimmolation]

[ ... he is trying to figure out a way so she is not fucked up about it but he doesn't think saying he was fine with it will help so he's like hhhhhhh ]

... Don't think about it too much.

[sharkgirl]

I'm trying not to. It's like when you tell someone not to think about a pink elephant and that's the first thing you do.

[a little sniff. she's a cat, so it sounds kind of weird, but.] It's not like I haven't seen people die before. I have, a lot.

[selfimmolation]

So have I. It doesn't make it easy. [ this is such a bummer. damn it. ]

[sharkgirl]

[it's different, she thinks, when it's someone she cares about.

she's quiet again, and then:]

Nico - Nico told me if I wanted to, I could go to his world. After all of this is over. If we don't fuck up. [...] But I thought about...

[she stops. she just stops there.]