catchall nimona

[selfimmolation]

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[sharkgirl]

... The light went out.

[this is not helpful thank you]

There was - a forest, and all of you... [she pauses. her voice gets kind of distant] All of you told me I should die. But I saved myself. Or I thought I did. And then I met everybody else, and I was carrying a light. I heard your voice in it.

But I saw you. And you asked me to kill you, and the light went out.

[selfimmolation]

[ he looks like he's only half-following along, and it's not just because nimona is sort of only half-telling it. his brain is juice. but: ]

I wouldn't ask you to do that. [ he's saying it a little desperately, like he needs her to know. ]

[sharkgirl]

[her brain is also juice so she's not doing a very good job, but.]

... I don't - I couldn't. [she would never have been able to.] It doesn't matter. The light went out and I couldn't control my shape anymore. And I tried to kill Datz, and Ponta, and the fox guy. And I almost did it, but he stabbed me through the heart first.

[selfimmolation]

[ TWO JUICEBOXES, ONE THREAD ]

... [ his hold kind of tightens and he makes a noise like he is going to fight that guy anyway but; ] You don't need light to control yourself. It was just Tem's world being terrible.

[sharkgirl]

[juiceboxes but like when you can't get the straw to go in so you just jab it a bunch of times that's what her brain feels like

anyway that's fair she also kind of wants to fight kogi even though she told him to do it. she wraps her arms around him and just hugs him again, closing her eyes.]

I know. [...] It was all I had left, though.

[selfimmolation]

...The light?

[ the me? wait no. at least he doesn't say it out loud because he is busy holding her ]

[sharkgirl]

[a little nod.]

The lantern. It... got me through. You all... [well. she doesn't really want to talk about that so much, but.] We went to the temple to get rid of the bow, and everybody but me had people to guide them.

[memshares part of the cyoa (no) (unless)]

[selfimmolation]

[ do it ]

... The bow... from the church? [ trying to remember what he learned from temenos while his brain is juice ] You only had the lantern, but everyone else had a guide. Is that it?

[sharkgirl]

[the panels flutter weakly, ripped out of a story book, splayed out.

for three of you, the light of the sacred flame shines true and bright as it takes the shapes of your memories. it inspires. it brightens - it casts light through the dim dungeon in brilliance. your steps ahead are assured. the truth lies in the flame - the undeniable feeling of the fact that you’re almost there. you’ve nearly found your way back to the city, back to your friends, back to the life you want to have. you just have to hope a little longer, and move forward further in the dark.

for one of you, there's nothing like that at all. you are a few steps behind, still holding the black bow. your injuries aren’t bothering you. your body doesn’t hurt. but something is wrong. you are so lonely. you're left behind in the dark. you're alone, like always, and you wonder why nobody came for you like the rest of them. it hurts.

all four of you press through the shrine towards the sound of the whimpering. and, as the ghosts of your inspiration and lights melt away, back into your lanterns, you find something curled up in a deep, dark corner of the shrine, at the very, very back. at first, it’s hard to see. but as you approach, you realize what’s facing you is... a monster.

it is huge - the creature’s protruding vertebrae nearly touch the ceiling of the temple, but unlike in the sprite, the monster is collapsed in a heap on the ground, breathing heavily. it looks badly wounded - arrows stick out of its torso, in the space between its protruding ribcage bones, and the fabric of whatever torn asunder thing it wore at some point is dirtied and bloodied, though it’s hard to tell if its human blood or something else. black shadow pours off of its figure, and it stares at you with its eerily glowing, pinkish purple eyes, its tongue lolling out of its mouth. its head is flat on the ground, and each breath it takes comes on a wheeze.

all of you, just by looking, can tell whatever this thing is - it’s miserable. dust sprinkles off of it in pieces, as if it is very slowly disintegrating, but it is so, so slow.

Kill… me…

it looks at you. and for a moment, it's not a monster, it's him, tall and grinning, freckles splashed across his nose and cheeks. his eye's a little worse for wear this last week, but it's fine. he tells you that he can see just fine, and that he'd have to be some kind of weakling to get taken out here. he grabs his hat and puts it down on your head, and for a second, everything is okay.

and then it's not. you see, for a second, you see portgas d. ace struggling to breathe, taking his last, staring up at you and asking you to kill him, and.

your lantern goes out.

and you scream.

nimona chokes, and leans away from ace to spit blood on the ground from biting her tongue too hard.]

[selfimmolation]

[ i regret saying yes to this

ace stares, a little uncomprehending, because it's actually-- familiar, in a few ways-- he's seen that monster before, and that bow, even if he can't quite remember where all of a sudden, and he's died, but this wasn't... how he died. he struggled to breathe, but not like that. right? right? he was choking on something but it was blood and tears and lava, and he didn't ask anyone to kill him because there was no dodging it.

(except he did ask someone to kill him, but it was a cell, and garp didn't--) ]

That didn't happen. [ he says it a little belatedly, a little blankly, clutching at nimona even though all she did was lean away ] It didn't.

[sharkgirl]

[ c:

she leans back in, when he clings to her. brushes the blood away from her mouth.]

... It wasn't real. [it didn't happen, except it kind of did. she rests her head against his shoulder again.] You didn't even have to tell me the details.

[she saw it anyway. she reaches for his hand and holds it.]

[selfimmolation]

[ she can hold his hand. they are both a little fucked up, but not anymore than when he was punching trees a few weeks ago. he's frowning up as he holds her ]

It's not how it happened. [ he still doesn't say how it actually happened, because he is lucid enough to think nope!!! on that. instead he confesses, like he needs to get it off his chest: ] I'm... I let you get hurt. And Hung died. And Lillium's friend. And--and--

[ he kind of... laughs? ]

They gave me his strawhat. How'd that fucking thing make it?

[sharkgirl]

[she just kind of looks over his hand with a little frown.]

In... in yours. [she says, after a second, because it takes her that long to readjust.] You didn't let me get hurt. Hung's okay.

[...]

His - what?

[selfimmolation]

[ it's like he clawed and scrapped at stone, so his nails are fucked up. don't worry about it. ]

His stupid strawhat. [ he repeats it like he can't handle it, but then he breathes out ] ... It wasn't real either. But you're-- [ he gestures a little against her like it means something ] You're so worried about me but I could've helped you. Both of you. But he was stuck, and I couldn't... I promised. I couldn't leave him.

[ thanks that sort of explains nothing. ]

[sharkgirl]

[jesus okay

there's a pause.] What happened to you?

[she just keeps holding his hand, carefully.]

[selfimmolation]

Nothing. That's the--point, you all got hurt, but we were fine, and it was my fault for-- and it asked me if I should try again like I'd done it before.

[ there's a pause and he looks at nimona kind of distantly ]

There were... termites? [ no. that's wrong? he shakes his head ] That's not it. Forget it. It wasn't real. [ he just looks tired and he holds her closer again. he is all tense. ] ... The fox killed you but you came back. Right?

[ kind of a "are you real" moment ]

[sharkgirl]

[when he holds her closer she just leans up and wraps her arms around his shoulders and rests her head there, too. it hurts to do, but she thinks both of them might need it a little.]

Yeah. I think... I think Temenos brought me back to life. [she says, slowly.] I heard his voice.

I'm alive. [...] I wasn't in any explosions.

[selfimmolation]

Being stabbed through the heart isn't better. [ he's careful holding her despite it all, though he sounds mad about that. he says "thanks, temenos", internally, even though he doesn't know if it was the real one or not. and then he thinks it doesn't matter, so he kind of mutters: ] Thanks, Tem. ... You get in so much trouble.

[ it's a half-hearted attempt at a joke. he is vaguely aware it's his second go he is not allowed to talk, but. god. he's glad he didn't come out that long after her. ]

[sharkgirl]

[she makes an annoyed sound at his joke, but it's not super serious.]

This is the second time you've come out of one of these and I get in so much trouble? [grumbles.

she is also very glad that he didn't come out much longer after her, because she would have been in a state.]

... You don't have to tell me everything, but. [a beat.] Did it just put you in a place where you had to pick between people?

[selfimmolation]

Yep.

[ without any hesitation, knowing it's hypocritical. it's his right. he frowns at the question a little ]

... No. It wasn't just that. We were... detectives. I think it was Tama's world. Or-- Ryuki's, I guess? [ it's the same world. ] We had to... solve a murder.

[ he realizes the absolute ridiculousness of it at all CONSIDERING GESTURES AT MURDERGAME and he kind of laughs tiredly into her bloody goopy hair ]

[sharkgirl]

[he laughs, and she kind of does that like ughhh really sort of laugh, like she can't believe what she's hearing.]

Yeah, like you don't do that enough. [god.] Did you solve it?

[selfimmolation]

... Not really. [ he sounds kind of frustrated about that, but in that sort of "of course you didn't do it you fucking moron" self-deprecating kind of way. ] It was... like a cult thing. He was wearing a mask, and he had... you, and Hana, and Sigrun tied up with bombs. The entire place was rigged to blow up. We found you. And Hung, Luffy and Lillium's friend did too. Then he said either we killed Luffy and the others, or he'd detonate it all.

[ there is a long, long pause. ]

We went to a place called Denny's before that.

[ THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT. ]

[sharkgirl]

[NOT THE DENNY'S

she pauses, and then:]

You didn't kill Luffy. [she knows that he would not. she says it sort of simply.

anyway.] Isn't Denny's a place to eat at?

[selfimmolation]

Yeah. We met the guy at midnight, so we went out to eat before that. And we also had lunch. I stole a cultist's money to pay for it.

[ he doesn't answer the luffy thing just yet. it's important to note he absolutely mugged a guy as a cop. he is so good at being a cop. 10/10.

after a while of either being lost in thought or dodging the subject; ]

I tackled the guy. I think Jolyne helped. [ he thinks, because the guy asked him to kill Luffy, and ace sort of stopped thinking altogether. ] He blew it all up. ... Hung tried to shield you guys.

[ he sort of tugs gently at her hand, like reminding himself she is there ]

...I dunno where he went. The place was collapsing when we woke up. We could've... I think if we'd grabbed you and run, we could've made it. But Luffy and Lillium's friend were stuck under rubble. I couldn't... leave him. I promised. I promised, and Sabo kept telling me I had to go, but I couldn't-- he's our brother, I couldn't go, he should know, he asked me to--

[ he's kind of babbling and getting a little hysterical, and there is no explanation of where the hell sabo comes into this, but instead of a memshare of the cyoa, nimona gets this ]

[sharkgirl]

[that is absolutely important to note. best cop.

she's quiet, listening, and when he tugs her hand she squeezes his. she's here. and she is so phenomenally bad at this but she cannot just - she can't just sit here and be stupid while he's losing it, and so she starts to try to soothe, to comfort, somehow, any way at all.]

Hey - hey, hey. [she starts, and then she gets interrupted by the memory.

which is worse, really. it just digs at her, claws into her heart and makes her want to wail in sympathy. she's never been able to deal with little kids crying. especially not like this. especially not when he's here, years later, working himself up to match. she drags in a little shuddery breath and leans back and takes both his hands.]

Ace.

[it's okay, it's okay.]